Dana Lauren Bonnano Is Home, Safe And Sound.

Dana-Bonanno-33-BROOKLYN-NY-Missing-July-22-2013

That being said, I am taking issue with one Chelsea Hoffman.

Chelsea is supposedly a writer, self-proclaimed at best, that likes to cling to the sensationalism of tragedies to bring herself attention. She started drawing attention to herself by incorrectly drawing a conclusion in this fashion: “With it being already over two weeks since anyone last seen her, it’s probably safe to say it’s already too late.”  See her brilliance here: The Dana Bonanno mystery: Do roommates know what happened? It must be lovely to be so wrong.

In this article: Dana Lauren Bonanno mystery: Foul play, drugs or mental illness? Chelsea shows her dogmatic luster. While a mother is suffering because she has no clue where her daughter is, Chelsea says: “At one point the missing woman’s mother claimed that she called her in ‘an emergency that didn’t sound like an emergency.’ What on earth does this even mean? Comments like these sound idiotic and only serve to confuse those who are trying to find this missing woman. “

So Dana’s mother is idiotic. Very well said, Chelsea.  She also said: “The lack of media coverage in this case is perplexing, because that means there is a lack of questions being asked.” Her brilliance can’t be matched, talk about perplexing. How does Chelsea draw such enigmatic conclusions?

Speaking of brilliance, let’s look at the opening lines of her article:  “The search for Dana Lauren Bonanno continues, but there don’t appear to be any definitive updates to share in the case — which is perplexing, considering it hasn’t even been a month since she was last seen.” There don’t appear to be any. There don’t appear to be any. I like how that rolls off the tongue. 

“Her mother revealed in the recent interview that Dana suffers from anxiety — and this could have very well been inflamed by the loss of her job, as I had speculated in earlier coverage of this case.”  Chelsea was a wunderkind, if you didn’t already pick up on that.

She also said: “This case is in danger of slipping through the cracks unless the media, the public and the NYPD snap into gear.” Apparently Ms. Hoffman indulges in a bit of rocket science in her free time.  The 94th precinct in NYC was on this case and it even had its own itty-bitty lead detective. But the NYPD didn’t snap into gear. The media ignored this case, which is why it was all over the news in NYC, Westchester, Putnam, and Dutchess Counties, and as close as Great Britain via the Daily Mail UK

” these are all telltale signs of drug use or mental illness. If police can eliminate these possibilities from the root of her disappearance, then there could be a possibility of foul play in her disappearance.” Chelsea wants to help find Dana while also drawing the conclusion that she is just some strung out junkie. We all have personal, incredibly debilitating issues throughout life that make us resort to all sorts of actions… Chelsea is the one human immune to said fact. 

Now for the bee’s knees, you can:  fan her Facebook page to follow her latest projects. If you’re interested in learning about criminal profiling, missing persons or serial killers, consider enrolling in the Crime Studies class taught by crime analyst and profiler Chelsea Hoffman!” Glad to know I can keep her facebook page cool in such hot weather. I am honestly thinking about enrolling in her crime studies class online. Yes. She teaches this stuff. Her talent knows no bounds.  

This is her filming a thunderstorm for good reason:

Now that Dana, an old friend of mine, is home… Chelsea wants in on the “Yay She Is Home” bandwagon. Welcome aboard,Chels. Beg for mercy and stick to polluting your own state’s media.

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Chelsea Hoffman

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